Bacon and God's Abundance

...And now, without further ado;

The story of how 2012 sucks less than the last six years combined even if Jesus returns for the Mayans this year.

 I've always struggled with really trusting God.  I know He loves me, but felt that I still had to look out for myself. He doesn't owe me peace and good haircuts.  I always thought it made sense that if I believed Him "all out'', He might test my commitment by destroying my life (because that's loving?). It's not right.  I'm just explaining my flawed thinking.

On January third, I sat quietly and watched the sun rise through the sheers.  Coffee and reading material in hand, I just said,...

"I trust You. Take it all; if You want."

In that moment, I knew He was doing something new; I would know it when I saw it.

At 9:30 that morning I got a text from Mickey.  His firm had merged; he'd call me later.  Third, in years of experience, in a 10 person firm, he'd had no clue.

My birthday, is on the 18th. Mickey threw me a surprise party on Friday. I got several gifts; a notepad and pen, a coffee gift card, a red dress and 28 1/2 pounds of good bacon.

You read that right.

My friend wanted get me a good gift and prayed and thought, "bacon."  She thought I needed to understand God's abundance towards me. We had a conversation a couple of weeks before about  bacon, but when she'd explained the bit about God's abundance, I was at a loss.  Abundant bacon didn't seem to extend to general abundance. But the bacon was incredible.

Our household finances remained tight, but Mickey was being built up on the inside, where a man's identity lives. He got a job offer a week for the first six weeks of the year.

I began to have a vision of the children of Israel with their manna in the desert.  And oh, how they bitched.  He still fed them; then they stood at the edge of the promised land and wouldn't receive God's blessing.  They were so used to their circumstances they had just come to expect more trial.  It's in the Bible so we learn from it.  People aren't supposed to do that.

So I won't.

Two weeks ago, my husband interviewed with a new firm.  They called him back in under two hours.  He didn't know what to do.  I mean it. He's been treated like mushroom for so long (kept in the dark and fed a lot of crap), he didn't know whether to "commit suicide or go bowling".  For a minute.

He gave his notice Friday.